Interveiw the Writter 1
by Iris Skylark Moon
Summary: During and interveiw, the hosts and guests get a little out of control. Stars me as the one being interveiwed and others.


Why I Hate the Guidelines

Due to the fact that posting something on must mean it has to _be_ a fan-fiction I have decided to make this an interview with random people from random series interviewing me. DON'T ASK WHY!

GROVER: Hello, Iris. It's wonderful to have you on our show today.

IRIS (ME): Oh that means so much to me!

KRONOS: Speak for yourself goat-boy! Any fan of Percy's is an enemy of mine. *Glares at audience*

Flashing sign that directs the audience to do something (let's just call it Sign): Laugh

(A/N: The audience always mimics Sign)

I: *Scootches away from Kronos*

G: Sooo, Iris, I heard that you've been having some issues with the guidelines for .

I: Well, Grover. This is most certainly true.

G: What have these issues been?

K: NO ONE GIVES A DAMN!

Sign: Laugh

K: *growls*

I: No matter how many times I read and reread the guidelines and check off the _"__Yes, I have read and agreed to the content guidelines"_, every time I try to upload anything, I have to click it again.

G: *playing cat's cradle* Sounds _very_ interesting.

Sign: Laugh

I: How is that funny?

K: I don't know, you wrote it.

Sign: Laugh

I: What the heck! That's not even funny!

G: *throws cat's cradle behind him* Okay then! Let's move on!

I: But the sign! It-

G: Why do you hate…*pausing for dramatic affect*… "your shift key"?

I: My WHAT!

Sign: Laugh

K: *points at audience with evil glare* SHUT UP! IT'S NOT EVEN FUNNY!

G: *suddenly has a French mustache* Oh contraire, _Monsieur_!

Sign: Laugh

K: OH MY GOD!

G: *in very feminine voice* In your case it would be Olympians or Gawds!

K: DON'T RUBE IT IN GOAT BOY!

G: *suddenly shirtless with boxing gloves and shorts* YOU WANNA FIGHT KID!

K: *in similar ensemble* PREPARE TO DIE!

I: WHAT THE HECK! *hiding under coffee table*

Background: Flushing toilet.

_Everyone pauses, perplexed. _

Sign: Laugh

K: GAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!

_The Joker walks in background, toilet paper trailing form his shoe._

Joker: Wh~y soo serious? *walks up to K* Let's put a smi~ile on that face of yours!

K: * glares*

J: *holds up knife, smiling*

K: *punches J sending him flying off stage*

Sign: Laugh

K: AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!

G: EXACTLY!

I: *still under table* WHAT THE HELL!

Off Stage: GROVER!

G: Ye~es! *feminine voice again*

_Percy walks on stage. Audience erupts into applause. Multiple shouts of "Oh my gawds! It's Percy Jackson!" and "Percy, I love you!"_

P: *waves sheepishly*

I: *crawls out from under table*

G: Make it quick, I'm about to defeat Kronos! *takes up fighting stance*

P: Didn't I already do that?

G: Yes! But this time Kronos will be defeated not as a Titan but as my CO-HOST!

P: Co-host!

G: IT WAS HER IDEA! *points at me*

P: So you're the writer of this. It's good to meet you. *shakes hand*

I: *blushes* Oh I'm a really big fan of your series.

P: Lot of people are. *turns to G* Grover!

G: Ye~es!

P: Perhaps it's time that you finish unveiling your plan.

K: What plan?

G: Yes, thank you number 2.

K: Number 2?

G: Ladies and gentlemen, my plan is- Scottie Do!

K: SCOTTIE-DO?

P: Oh, come on! You're such a lame ass!

K: WFT!

I: Shhh! Just watch! *says while shoving popcorn in mouth* Whant shum? (Want some?)

K: *glares* *shoves popcorn in mouth*

G: _Mini-me aime chocolat!_ (Mini-me likes chocolate!)

K: *stares in horror, popcorn falling out of mouth*

G: POP! (popping noise you can made with lips)

P: *glares*

G: _Scottie ne pas!_ (Scottie don't)

K: WHO DA HELL IS SCOTTIE?

P: Ooooohhhhhh

G: Ooooohhhhhh *vacant stare*

P: Ooooohhhhhh

G: Ooooohhhhhh *shrugs*

P: Ooooohhhhhh

G: Oohhggg *turns into groan*

P: Yeah, I'll just-

G: UGH! DUH! *INTERRUPTION*

P: Oh, so we'll just-

G: UBA GUBA DUH! *vacant look*

P: You know this is causing me serious physiological harm!

Sign: Laugh

_In this span of time Iris and Kronos are shoveling popcorn into their mouths, giggling._ (Yes, even the Titan Lord giggles)

K: Only time it's expectable! (Anything causing pain to Percy is funny to him)

G: You can leave now… *points off stage*

…..**AWKWARD PAUSE**…

P: Okay *exits*

G: *sits back in chair with physiatrists' outfit and glasses* So what is your dilemma with "your shift key"?

Sign: Laugh

K: GAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH! *flips over coffee table in fit of anger*

Sign: If you're happy and you know it clap your hand!

_Everyone claps except Kronos including Grover, Iris, the Joker, and Percy. _(Joker and Percy off-stage)

K: STOP CLAPPING!

Sign: If you're happy and you know it stomp your feet!

_Same as the clapping incident. Percy and Joker come on stage._

K: STOP STOMPING!

Sign: If you're happy and you know it shout OHLAY!

_Everyone shouts!_

K: GAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH! *pulls out scythe and cuts down sign*

_Everything goes quiet except the sound of electricity buzzing from the wires._

K: *panting heavily with evil glare on face*

_Percy and Joker start scribbling something in the background. Holds up sign that says laugh!_

_Everyone laughs!_

K: GAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH! I'LL KILL YOU!

P: I'd like to see you try!

K: *chucks scythe at Percy's head*

P: AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH! *ducks, scythe hits Joker, he falls to the ground dead*

G: Well that's all the time we have for today so see you next time! *background: Joker is dead on the floor, Kronos is chasing Percy swinging the scythe and knocking over the props on stage, Percy is laughing, I'm running after them with a pen and paper writing it all down, Grover smiles dumbly into the camera as the audience laughs and applauses*


End file.
